When the Nights Seem Long

It was the middle of the night, and darkness covered the sky.  I was a young mom of a newborn and a toddler, eyes heavy, deeply fallen into sleep.  The whole house quiet, resting.  She screamed; I startled, the sound piercing my ears.

"Lord, help me get through this, give me the strength, give me the love I need," I pleaded.  I needed Him.  

He softly whispered, "Give thanks."  

I wearily opened her door, walked in her room, picked her up, and held her, blocking out the noise and shutting out the din.  I rocked her, comforted her, and calmed her, and I whispered my thanks.

Thank you, God, for this baby.  I know you give and take away.  Thank you for giving her to me.  My little blessing baby, born to me after a miscarriage.  Pregnancy after a miscarriage is hard: nine long months wondering if she would make it, wondering if it would end in tears of joy or sadness.  Thank you for holding my angel baby and allowing me to hold this baby.     

Thank you for the sound that comes out of her tiny body.  She is loud, healthy, and vibrant.  She is ready to live life, and she won't live life quietly.  She will leave her mark.

Thank you for this house we are in, for this glider in which I sit.  You have provided for us, and taken care of us.

Thank you for rest.  Let me sit here and be still.  I will hold my baby, and I will rest.

Thank you, Father, for showing me this small glimpse of your love.  The way you love me, through all my screams and shrieks, is the way I love her.  My heart is full of love for her, just as Yours overflows with love for me.

Thank you for the gift of being a mother.  In this moment, she needs me.  Let me live in this moment, soak it all in, and always remember this feeling of holding this precious life You have given.  You made her and formed her.  I love her voice, her eyes, her hair, her face because I know You formed them especially for her.  

She calmed, she was asleep, and I longed for my bed, but I didn't move.  I held her, I rocked her, and I stayed in the moment as long as I could.  One day, she will not need me like this anymore, so let me stay in this moment and soak it all in.